running shoes with jeans women image
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In your opinion, what do you think is too big in
women shoes/sneakers to wear skinny jeans?
Answer
I don't think there is a shoe size too big to wear skinny jeans. I actually don't think foot size has anything to do with how well a woman can pull off a pair of skinny jeans. Rather, I think the proportioning of a shoe affects how a pair of jeans look.
For example, I wouldn't wear skinny jeans with running shoes, but I think they look adorable with Converse or Vans. When I first started wearing skinny jeans (I have shorter legs with a little curve) I felt a little awkward wearing flats with them, because I felt like they made my legs look weird and feet stand out too much. So I started out wearing them with heels balance the proportions. Now love wearing them with ballet flats!
My recommendation would be to start out wearing a pair of shoes you feel really great in so as not to feel awkward about larger feet. The most important thing is to feel comfortable. If you want to wear them, but are a little weary, maybe try wearing them dressier with heels in the at first. Worked for me :)
I don't think there is a shoe size too big to wear skinny jeans. I actually don't think foot size has anything to do with how well a woman can pull off a pair of skinny jeans. Rather, I think the proportioning of a shoe affects how a pair of jeans look.
For example, I wouldn't wear skinny jeans with running shoes, but I think they look adorable with Converse or Vans. When I first started wearing skinny jeans (I have shorter legs with a little curve) I felt a little awkward wearing flats with them, because I felt like they made my legs look weird and feet stand out too much. So I started out wearing them with heels balance the proportions. Now love wearing them with ballet flats!
My recommendation would be to start out wearing a pair of shoes you feel really great in so as not to feel awkward about larger feet. The most important thing is to feel comfortable. If you want to wear them, but are a little weary, maybe try wearing them dressier with heels in the at first. Worked for me :)
What is expected of a non-muslim young woman in a turkish/muslim household?
freshazfcu
Iv'e started dating a turk and have been introduced to his family but are tottally unaware of their customs. I have a few things down such as no shoes and the two kisses but I would really appreciate more information and my boyfriend is no help.
Answer
Interesting question!
I would love to be able to say to you that you only need to be yourself - but some families do put a lot of store by traditions and ways of behaving, so it's sensible to ask.
I wouldn't recommend that you do anything that you are not comfortable with - so as a non-muslim, don't offer to cover your hair (if they cover theirs). Inter-cultural relationships are not about changing yourself to the other person's religion or way of life - they are about both of you adapting to each other.
If you start doing anything that you don't feel comfortable with, just to impress them, you may end up committed to it. Dress-wise, keep your shoulders and ankles covered. Jeans should be fine, and a modest top that's not too low cut.
You mention the 'two kisses'. Did you know about kissing the hand and putting it to your forehead? This is done as a sign of respect to older relatives, or even those who are older than you but not by much. It can be hard to judge sometimes!
If you ask your boyfriend, he will tell you if his family do this or not - but then again, he may dismiss it as not necessary, when his family might really be charmed. Try it out on his mum! I'm sure they'd be thrilled by the fact that you'e learnt it, and charmed by it. It certainly can't offend, as it is a guesture of respect.
The traditional role of the daughter in law (gelin) in the Turkish household would be to serve the men and take a lot of the work from the mother in law. That would include helping with serving any guests who came to the house. I don't think this would be expected from you just yet - a Turkish girl would probably know exactly what to do, but they'll realise you won't. A guesture in this direction would be the right thing though.
Helping out in the kitchen would really go down well. It's a fine line when someone is shooing you to sit down, as to whether they really mean that they don't want you to help out (or meddle in their kitchen!) or whether they are being polite because you are a guest. At least make the effort. Perhaps you could offer to help with the cay (the tea) to start with. If the first 'brew' has been made, the next top up is by pouring a little from the smaller of the two 'kettles' and then topping up the glass with hot water from the larger one. Maybe if your boyfriend's mum has brought the tray in, you could offer to top up the glasses?
Or you could offer to help out with washing the dishes if you've had a meal (while the men go and sit down). But remember to wash off all the soap suds and not leave it to drain off. An efficient method is to soap up all the dishes, then run the water and rinse them all at the same time.
You may already do this at home - but some people leave soap suds to drain. Turkish people usually wouldn't, as they don't want to be ingesting all that soap.
You might not feel confident enough to do these things at first - especially if you don't speak Turkish (boyfriends don't make good interpreters!).
So the most important thing is probably to smile a lot at first and behave modestly. If you smoke, see if you can restrain yourself while you're there. Unless they're a very modern family, it can be seen as a bit crude for a woman to smoke.
Learn at least one Turkish phrase that you can use confidently (if you don't already speak it). If they then praise your Turkish, respond with 'estagfurullah' (est ahhhhh fuh rul lah), which is an old ottoman expression of modesty. I think this will surprise and impress them!
Oh, gosh - I could go on for ages. Turkish families are an interesting study. You may already know that some Turkish parents are sceptical about having a 'yabanci' girl for a daughter in law, so be patient with them and just concentrate on being pleasant. It will be your boyfriend's job to discuss it with them and smooth their worries!
One last tip - if you take a gift with you, don't make it too extravagant. His mother will feel obliged to give you something in return, and you don't want to make it a burden. Some biscuits that she could serve with the cay might be a good idea.
Good luck. It's nerve wracking, and you will feel that you really want to be accepted. Let them take the lead, and respond by smiling all the while!
If at the end of the day, they don't take to you despite all your efforts, don't take it personally. Turkish hospitality can be at surface level..... even if they hate the idea of a non Muslim daughter in law, they will probably still be polite. As in all nationalities, not everyone is 'nice'. If they turn out not to be as warm to you as you hoped for, my advice would be to hold your head up and just respond with politeness always. By all means, moan to your boyfriend at home (and expect some sympathy!!), but let him do any 'fighting' with them. Don't give them any excuse to criticise.
I'm sure you'll be fine!
Interesting question!
I would love to be able to say to you that you only need to be yourself - but some families do put a lot of store by traditions and ways of behaving, so it's sensible to ask.
I wouldn't recommend that you do anything that you are not comfortable with - so as a non-muslim, don't offer to cover your hair (if they cover theirs). Inter-cultural relationships are not about changing yourself to the other person's religion or way of life - they are about both of you adapting to each other.
If you start doing anything that you don't feel comfortable with, just to impress them, you may end up committed to it. Dress-wise, keep your shoulders and ankles covered. Jeans should be fine, and a modest top that's not too low cut.
You mention the 'two kisses'. Did you know about kissing the hand and putting it to your forehead? This is done as a sign of respect to older relatives, or even those who are older than you but not by much. It can be hard to judge sometimes!
If you ask your boyfriend, he will tell you if his family do this or not - but then again, he may dismiss it as not necessary, when his family might really be charmed. Try it out on his mum! I'm sure they'd be thrilled by the fact that you'e learnt it, and charmed by it. It certainly can't offend, as it is a guesture of respect.
The traditional role of the daughter in law (gelin) in the Turkish household would be to serve the men and take a lot of the work from the mother in law. That would include helping with serving any guests who came to the house. I don't think this would be expected from you just yet - a Turkish girl would probably know exactly what to do, but they'll realise you won't. A guesture in this direction would be the right thing though.
Helping out in the kitchen would really go down well. It's a fine line when someone is shooing you to sit down, as to whether they really mean that they don't want you to help out (or meddle in their kitchen!) or whether they are being polite because you are a guest. At least make the effort. Perhaps you could offer to help with the cay (the tea) to start with. If the first 'brew' has been made, the next top up is by pouring a little from the smaller of the two 'kettles' and then topping up the glass with hot water from the larger one. Maybe if your boyfriend's mum has brought the tray in, you could offer to top up the glasses?
Or you could offer to help out with washing the dishes if you've had a meal (while the men go and sit down). But remember to wash off all the soap suds and not leave it to drain off. An efficient method is to soap up all the dishes, then run the water and rinse them all at the same time.
You may already do this at home - but some people leave soap suds to drain. Turkish people usually wouldn't, as they don't want to be ingesting all that soap.
You might not feel confident enough to do these things at first - especially if you don't speak Turkish (boyfriends don't make good interpreters!).
So the most important thing is probably to smile a lot at first and behave modestly. If you smoke, see if you can restrain yourself while you're there. Unless they're a very modern family, it can be seen as a bit crude for a woman to smoke.
Learn at least one Turkish phrase that you can use confidently (if you don't already speak it). If they then praise your Turkish, respond with 'estagfurullah' (est ahhhhh fuh rul lah), which is an old ottoman expression of modesty. I think this will surprise and impress them!
Oh, gosh - I could go on for ages. Turkish families are an interesting study. You may already know that some Turkish parents are sceptical about having a 'yabanci' girl for a daughter in law, so be patient with them and just concentrate on being pleasant. It will be your boyfriend's job to discuss it with them and smooth their worries!
One last tip - if you take a gift with you, don't make it too extravagant. His mother will feel obliged to give you something in return, and you don't want to make it a burden. Some biscuits that she could serve with the cay might be a good idea.
Good luck. It's nerve wracking, and you will feel that you really want to be accepted. Let them take the lead, and respond by smiling all the while!
If at the end of the day, they don't take to you despite all your efforts, don't take it personally. Turkish hospitality can be at surface level..... even if they hate the idea of a non Muslim daughter in law, they will probably still be polite. As in all nationalities, not everyone is 'nice'. If they turn out not to be as warm to you as you hoped for, my advice would be to hold your head up and just respond with politeness always. By all means, moan to your boyfriend at home (and expect some sympathy!!), but let him do any 'fighting' with them. Don't give them any excuse to criticise.
I'm sure you'll be fine!
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Title Post: What womens foot size is too big to wear skinny jeans?
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