How can a woman look more appealing and approachable?

best athletic shoes overweight women image

jecesa

I've always been told that I look like a librarian. I'm asking for advice about how to look less like a librarian and more like someone you'd want to know.

I don't get asked out anymore and miss having a boyfriend. Although I know that being approached isn't all about looks, I'd like to improve on the outside to help improve my first impressions at least. I'm short, currently overweight but with a good figure at every weight I've been and pretty good legs. I have waist length fairly straight hair -sometimes with bangs. I wear glasses (tried contacts and they aren't workable). I know how to do makeup in a variety of ways - from nearly invisible to just even skin tone, conceal dark circles; to do more dramatic makeup, and everything inbetween, but most days I don't do any. I'm middle aged taken for 30-35 and act around 30-35 (or younger) but my 50th birthday is in the past.

I'm not going to post my picture, but when people comment on my looks, the comments about my face include lovely, pretty, and occasionally beautiful. I have big dark eyes that look sad to me. Although I can be quite chatty, I am anxious when I meet people or go in public and I'm working on this. I think I might wear a quite serious face when I'm not talking.

I don't dye my hair - it's dark brown with random strands of grey, but everyone who comments on the color assumes I'm dyeing it to keep it brown. (in other words, I don't have the grey that many have at my age).

I used to dance ballet, so my posture is usually great, but I am self-conscious about being overweight, so that might have a negative influence on how I present myself. (trying to think of everything lol)
I don't currently have the clothes I'd like to wear. I'd *like* to wear dresses and wedge type heels, but spend most days in black jeans, t-shirts or layered tops. I also wear athletic shoes most of the time due to back & knee pain, but have recently been acquiring sandals I can manage.

I believe it looks best to always have a pedicure and manicure, but only sometimes have them both.

In public, random guys sometimes ask me if I'm married and if they can have my number, but it's always some rough looking, apparently less than well-educated random guy at a convenience store. Or, guys I would consider stare at me. But I'm looking to attract men who are acquaintances from activities and groups, so I know something about who they are, who they know, etc. I'm not seeking random strangers lol. Advice, please. (and don't be mean) ty

Answer
try some bright orange in your outfit somewhere. Also skinny jeans, but not to skinny, would make you more friendly looking. Also, instead of waiting for an approach, go approach some one yourself.

Anybody else out there have children who are big boned?

LifeIsGran

When my son was 12 we were at a doctor's appointment and he measured 5 feet and 126 pounds. I was shocked because he didn't look overweight at all. Or was I in denial? The doctor confirmed my suspicions that he had a large frame (aka big boned). His rib cage is huge and shoulders are broad. He has a solid look to him but he'll always have to be quiet about his weight because he'll always look about 20 pounds lighter than his true weight. There are always going to be ignorant people out there who will call him overweight when he really isn't. The positive side of this is that he'll always have a strong, solid look to him unless he becomes obese or something. Hopefully that'll never happen. He thinks his extra big feet are pretty cool too. LOL Anybody else in this situation? Are people in your life judgmental toward your big-boned kid or to yourself if you are big-boned too?
I know there are overweight people who claim to be big-boned when they're noticeably fat. I never heard of big-bones proven to be non-existent though. I did a search on the internet to see if I could find any medical websites to see if I could come up with a scientific study that supposedly proved that there was or wasn't such a thing as big bones. All I got was a bunch of differing opinions from non-medical people. Anybody got any medical links that confirm or deny the existence of big bones (large frame) or small bones (small frame). How much weight difference is there between those people and average frame people if varying bone structures exists? Medical or scientific websites only please. Thanks.

Answer
My daughter is 12.5 and is 5'4.5 " and weighs 125 lbs. And she wears a women's size 8.5 shoe. So she's a little bigger than your son. I myself thought she was overweight until a) I saw her next to her classmates at a school recital and she was the thinnest(she was held back a year and is a year older than all the other kids and still she was the thinnest) b) the doctor told me she was right in the middle of the height/weight chart. Since then I've become more accepting of it(I'm overweight myself and know how hard it can be with other children teasing you and didn't want my child to go through the same thing). She's very solid and not flabby so I think that will help her not to be picked on and she has long model type legs so clothes look good on her no matter the size. I think people are more accepting of boys who are big boned because they look more athletic and big boned girls don't fit the stereotype of what a girl should look like.

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